How women can sound more confident at work

How do you feel about speaking English?

Maybe you want to speak up in meetings at work. Perhaps you have to give a presentation or go to a job interview. Or possibly you’re preparing for a speaking exam. 

But speaking in English makes you so nervous! What can you do? 

Today I want to tell you how can you sound more confident in English, even if it’s not your first language. Try these strategies, you might not only sound more confident but also start to feel more confident too!

I wrote this post for working women who who use English in professional settings. This is because I mostly work with female students, helping them with their English and their confidence. 

But many of these tips are suitable for men too and some of them are applicable outside of work. And a lot of my advice is true when you’re speaking your first language too.

Women are perhaps more likely to worry about what other people think of them, especially in a work situation. Women are also judged more harshly than men are in many cases. I’m not saying that men judge women because I know that women can be equally judgemental.

I also want to point out that we might judge another person on how they speak without even realising that we’re doing it. It’s often a subconscious thing. Sometimes we find a person’s voice annoying but we don’t really know why. There’s a woman I often see on TV whose voice really irritates me and I have to reach for the remote control when I hear her! The reason? Look at point 5 below!

It’s not fair that women should have to make an extra effort or change the way they usually speak in order to be listened to and taken seriously at work. But it’s a sad reality that we haven’t yet achieved a fully equal society. 


So here are my tips on how you can sound more confident. 

1. Slow down
A lot of people speak faster when they are nervous. One way to sound more confident is to deliberately slow down. Don’t let the words come rushing out of your mouth. 

It’s OK to pause between sentences sometimes. This gives you time to think and it also gives your listeners time to think about and understand what you’re saying.

As well as sounding more confident when you slow down, you’ll also have more control over your language. You’re less likely to make mistakes if you take your time. This might make you feel more confident as well as making you sound better.

2. Know when to stop
I’ve noticed that some of my learners keep talking until I interrupt them. Each time I ask a question, they start answering really well but then they feel some need to keep going. Then they start repeating themselves, hesitating more and going off topic because they run out of ideas. It would be better if they stopped a bit sooner.

This is especially true for students preparing for an exam but it’s also relevant if you have a job interview or you’re answering questions about your presentation or in a meeting. Maybe we talk more when we’re nervous.

Not every answer has to be long and complicated. When you’ve said what you want to say, stop speaking and wait for the next question.

3. Don’t apologise
Stop saying “Sorry about my English”. It makes you sound unconfident. Instead say, “English isn’t my first language so let me know if you don’t understand anything.” Or perhaps you don’t need to say anything at all! You certainly don’t need to apologise for not being born in an English-speaking environment!

Similarly, avoid saying things like “Do you understand me?” or “Am I making sense?” because it sounds like you’re apologising for not being clear. Instead, say something like “What are your thoughts?” or “Do you have any questions?” and you’ll sound more confident.

4. Lower your pitch
“Pitch” means how high or low your voice is. Women naturally have higher voices than men. On top of that, our voices can go higher when we’re nervous. So if you’re practising a presentation or answering interview questions, try consciously lowering the pitch of your voice.

Margaret Thatcher, the first female Prime Minister in the UK, famously lowered her voice very deliberately so she sounded like she had more authority. I’m not suggesting you go that far (!) but just be aware of the pitch of your voice and keep it under control.

5. Avoid uptalk
“Uptalk” or “upspeak” means letting your voice go up at the end of a sentence, making it sound like you’re asking a question. I've read in various places that women do this more than men. This can result in them sounding less confident.

Uptalk can make you sound uncertain or like you’re waiting for your listeners to agree with you. It makes you sound less professional, less convincing and less authoritative. So practise making your voice go down at the end of a sentence.

6. Be more direct
Another generalisation here but men tend to be more direct and women are more indirect when they speak. In social settings, indirect language might be good for happy relationships but at work, it can make you sound uncertain and less confident.

I’m talking about words and phrases like “I think”, “just”, “kind of”, “maybe” and “a little”. Compare these two sentences:
I just think it will kind of be faster if maybe we could do it this way.
It will be faster if we do it this way. 

Do you see how the first one sounds nervous and apologetic while the second one sounds more confident? So try to reduce the amount of indirect language you use. 

7. Think about your posture
Stand up straight when you’re giving a presentation. Sit up straight if you’re in a meeting or a job interview. This will make you look more confident and you’ll even feel and sound more confident too.

8. Record yourself
If you’re practising for a job interview or presentation, try using your phone to record your voice. Then play it back and listen to how you sound.

Check for the things I’ve mentioned in this post. Are you using direct language. Does you voice go down at the end of a sentence? Are you talking at the right speed and pitch? It’s easier to notice these things when you listen to a recording than when you’re speaking.

9. Stop worrying about what other people think
As I get older, I worry a little less about what other people think of me, although I still have some work to do in this area! One thing that helps me is knowing that people don’t actually spend as much time thinking about me or about what I said! 

Some people are kind and some aren’t. Some people are always going to judge others. Sometimes they don’t even realise that they’re doing it. We can’t control how people react to us or what they will think. So why waste our time and energy worrying about it?


I hope you found these tips helpful. I encourage you to try at least one new idea and see how it works for you. The most important thing is to be yourself and communicate your thoughts without letting worries about others' opinions hold you back. Your opinions are valuable and with practice, you can express them with confidence.

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